Things NOT to say to a Depressed Person*

This post has probably been done a thousand times before, and I'm not promising that I have anything revolutionary to say on the matter, but some of the responses to my previous post made me think, and have therefore inspired this post. (I am aware that post was like...two months ago. I do apologize. I've been way too busy procrastinating).

#1: Cheer Up / Think Happy Thoughts / Be More Positive...

...or anything to that effect. This one is obvious when you write it down, but you'd be surprised. It's often a knee-jerk reaction when someone admits that they're feeling awful to respond with 'advice' such as the above, and although the intention is obviously good, it's also incredibly pointless. Depression is, amongst other things, an inability to think happy thoughts. You can't tell someone who has a physical illness to 'just get better', so don't treat mental illnesses any different. 

#2: It Could Be Worse / You Don't Have Any Reason To Be Depressed

Okay, I am aware both of these are different - the first is at least disguised as something caring, whereas the second is just downright rude. However, the effect of both tends to be pretty similar; both are guilt inducing. Speaking for myself, I am fully aware that my life is great. I have an amazing family, I adore my brothers and I'm surrounded by supportive people. None of these effect the fact that something in my brain makes me feel crap. Reminding me of this kind of just makes me feel ungrateful, when that's really not what this is.

#3: But You Don't Seem Depressed

I deeply apologize for forgetting to bring my literal dark cloud of sadness with me today. Seriously though, you don't get a free badge (although they should totally do that) when you get diagnosed, letting everyone know. What do you expect a Depressed Person to look like anyway?

On a side note. depression isn't always just 'feeling sad'. It has physical symptoms, along with sometimes just feeling...off, or tired or disconnected. People with depression are capable of being happy, or at least appearing so. It just tends to be less often. 

#4: It's All In Your Head

It's a mental illness, it's not going to be in my toe. This one is pretty self explanatory.

This also completely minimises someone's struggle, and is incredibly patronising. You're best off never saying this one. Ever.

#5: I Know How You Feel

Thing is, you don't. Nobody can ever know how another person is feeling. This doesn't just apply to people with depression, but with people struggling in general. I know it's really easy to say this as a way of showing someone you empathise with them, but truthfully, everyone's experiences are different.

#6: Happiness Is A Choice.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

#7: Have a Cup of Tea/ Go For A Run etc.

Though these things are nice, and can sometimes help, they don't cure illnesses. This is another one of those things that minimises the way someone's feelings and makes them feel like you're not taking them seriously, which you probably aren't if you're telling them to get a cup of tea, to be fair. (I am WELL aware that I included this in my last post, but that was me just explaining what calms me down. It's different when you tell someone you're struggling with depression and they respond with 'have you tried chamomile?')

I feel like you get the gist. Sorry if this was slightly abrasive. Don't worry if you've said these things to someone before, we're all humans here, and there's always next time. Use everything as a learning curve, try your best to understand the people around you and spread love. Peace out. x

*One of them is referring to them as a 'Depressed Person'. They're kind of just people. Also, these are from my experiences, please don't think I'm attempting to speak for an entire group of people.